How I can not Love a person

He walks into the store and says nothing to me.
He says nothing to me, however, he said a lot.
In the fact that he said nothing, I know that he knows exactly what I know.
We keep to ourselves
We keep everything we know, everything we talked about
People have this idea that there is that one person whom they " Love" and whom " loves" them and they are " destine" to be together right?
What about those whom are destine to never be together?
He knows what I say before I say it.
He can tell that I am depressed because he is also.
I know the feelings he feels.
He can say what I can't speak
I fear that we just don't talk to each other because we are too afraid of realizing that all this isn't true
What's odd isn't that we don't talk...But rather that he shows up, when I need him the most.
The feeling of discontent, and loneliness will be almost to much to bare...And than he will be there
His eyes never leaving mine
never looking away
never blinking
not staring, but speaking
Speaking to what I know as his way of saying..." I know, me too".
It's not love that I feel for him. It's not a crush or that kind of affection even. It's just him, and how he makes me feel much more sane than I have felt because he is a good person and to know he knows my darkest secretes...And still can look at me the same way, makes me understand that he understands much more

Love is just what I don't have. Love has been made into something so different in the past couple years. Made different by my family, by this war, by people in generally. It's no longer something that I feel. It's something that's shown. It's something that is package and tested. It's a rose on the bed, it's candy on a birthday, it's taking out the trash and it's not stealing the covers at night. I have been so destine to make love into something I can see and feel that I have practically put a time limit on it. I'm a strong believer in doing what I feel. I have no mental voice that tells me " No" because I have trained myself in one way or another to go with what I feel. Love, life, happiness and even sadness are what I have learned to use. For most, logic and facts are enough to tell them " no" but I wait for that feeling that says..." This isn't right" and the feeling that says " do it anyways". There isn't any formula, idea or package that comes with this method...Just outcomes. I'm waiting for life to tell me that this is ok.