I hope he learns

Last night I sat outside in the freezing weather trying to explain who I was to a person, I can only presume is also so tangled in their own life could only imagine what I was trying to say. The feeling of disconnect is slowly creeping back into my life. There's a feeling so strong, so full of importance, that it's making me ill. I sleep this feeling, I live this feeling, I AM this feeling. His answer is that is just the seen world around us. The still of the life we have over lived, and I...I know that this is a feeling in which lives in me. It's the feeling of a certain kind of loneliness, a certain kind of happiness and a strong emotion of certain recurring defeat.